The Dark Coin of Self Satisfaction and Self Criticism

German philosophy professor Eugen Herrigel taught in Japan in the 1920s. During his time there he studied Kyudo, the Japanese Art of Archery with a Zen master. His experiences are related in his book, Zen and The Art of Archery. 

He describes Kyudo as a spiritual practice - an exercise in overcoming one’s own ego. A primary goal of the teachings was to let go of expectations as to where the arrow would fly, and instead to focus entirely on the breath and one’s own actions. For many years Herrigel wasn’t permitted to shoot at a target, but instead a bail of hay, so as not to distract himself by worrying about the results. After some significant breakthroughs, the Master finally set up a target, but, again, Harrigel was told not to aim at the target when he shot, but rather to let the bow shoot itself. 

One day Herrigel experienced a level of focus that he hadn't felt before, effortlessly releasing beautiful shots at the target. As a result his ego swelled with pride and satisfaction. His master noticed and told him the following:

“You know already that you should not grieve over bad shots; learn now not to rejoice over the good ones. You must free yourself from the buffetings of pleasure and pain, and learn to rise above them in easy equanimity, to rejoice as though not you but another had shot well. This, too, you must practice unceasingly—you cannot conceive how important it is.”

There’s great emphasis in sports and in life on how to respond to failure. Equally important though is response to success. Self satisfaction and self criticism are two sides of the same dark coin. The way out of this cycle is through focused attention and non-judgemental awareness.